YOUR LETTERS - 11th January 2019

Royal Fail
Dear Cleveleys News,

Don’t you think our Royal Mail service is in a terrible state? Over the Christmas period I did not receive ANY Christmas cards at all; in fact I can’t remember the last time I received any post at all! Okay, so I live entirely “off the grid” in the back of a Ford Transit van after faking my own death at sea to avoid creditors and none of my family or friends know where I am or even that I am still alive, but still, it is a shocking service and we deserve better.

John Darwen
Ford Transit

Fracking
After years of protesting against Cuadrilla’s fracking operations on the Fylde, the dirty, smelly corporation have finally upped sticks and left. Good riddance to them! And thanks for saving our land and future must go to the diligent and committed protestors who have sat outside the site this entire time in all weathers, 24 hours a day. Finally they can go home to their cold, dark yurts and have a bath in cold water, presumably in one of those outside tin baths which doesn’t use any fossil fuels to heat the water. After protesting around the clock for more than a year I imagine there is more gas emitting from their armpits than Cuadrilla ever found beneath the shale.

Margaret Bedwetter
Wrea Green

Long Lost Friend
I grew up in Fleetwood during the 1950s and had a friend called John. I haven’t seen or heard from him since school and I was wondering if anybody of your readers knows him and could put me in touch? I have an issue of The Eagle that I borrowed and I really should give it back to him. After nearly 70 years I think this is bordering on an act of theft. Like I said, his name is John, I can’t remember much else about him. Anything would be appreciated.

John Johnson
Johannesburg

Silver Surfer
I just wanted to say that I am 94 years old and a proud “silver surfer”. I use the internet for all my communications, shopping and bill transactions. When high street businesses move online many people younger than me complain that they don’t know how to get online and shop, but if I can do it with just less than 6 years to go before my telegram from Her Majesty, then anyone can. Also, there isn’t anywhere on Cleveleys high street where I can buy my Manga videos from.

Marjorie Asakura
Cleveleys

Carry on Caring
I was very sad to read that Dame Barbara Windsor is now in the advanced stages of dementia and doesn’t always know where she is. It sounds like her younger husband is taking good care of her though, and I take my hat off to him for being so caring and patient. He’s a better man than I am, because if I were him I’d be tempted to tell her that I was Doctor Nookey at Borough County Hospital and she was Nurse Sandra May, then I’d see if we could act out a scene from the classic Carry on Doctor.

I know some people will say that isn’t how we should treat an elderly and vulnerable Dame of the British Empire, but I think it would be a good exercise for her long term memory, remembering her lines from all those years ago. Although she didn’t have that many lines, she mainly just lost her clothes in a variety of unlikely and humorous ways.

Barry
Bispham

Haunted Hotel
I think that the bar in the Regal Hotel in Cleveleys may be haunted.

Last week I was in there, I’d had a dozen or so pints with chasers, when I noticed the figure of a man go into the toilets. I thought it was probably a good idea to nip to the loo myself, so I followed him in there. I don’t have full recall of what happened next, but when I regained consciousness I was lying face down on the toilet floor. Half an hour had passed, the “man” was nowhere to be seen, and the spookiest thing of all was that I was covered in ectoplasm. It wasn’t green like in the Ghostbuster movies; it was more beige, and it had these eerie little orange cubes in it.

I have tried to get local ghost hunters to come and take a look but as yet none have responded to me, so I thought I’d write to you and advise your readers to beware.

Carl Ingblacklabel
Cleveleys